Would You Date You?

Perhaps the most fundamental - and least-asked - question that we ask ourselves in this thing called dating is this:

Would you date you?

You know, if you were the opposite sex. If you’re a man, can you imagine being a woman and believing that you’re a high-value potential suitor? If you’re a woman, do you think a man would or should be interested in you?

You may believe in yourself, but sometimes we have to work on the way we express that belief in order to put ourselves out there in the dating world. Here’s how.

Your First Impression

You might be an incredibly interesting person with a lot to offer, but does your first impression say that about you, or do you look like another face in the crowd?  If you want to expand your dating options, you’ll have to work on the way you make a first impression.  Here are some things to consider.

• Your style.  Be expressive with your clothes - a T-shirt and jeans might work as a “casual” look, but it doesn’t exactly feel very expressive, does it?  If you want to make a first impression that reflects your unique man-ness, you need to think about what kind of clothes you really want to wear.
• Your looks.  Work out, eat right, and make sure you don’t look like you recently escaped from the cave of bad hygiene.  One of the fastest things you can do to improve your looks is to get a haircut, a shave, and start washing yourself, for crying out loud.
• Your level of happiness.  Is hanging out with you a positive experience, or is it a drag?  Were you too busy trying to correct a woman’s Star Wars quote to remember to smile and have fun?  That’s easily fixed.

It doesn’t take much to turn around the kind of first impression you make, but it will require a little conscious effort.  Get on it.

Your Life

Part of becoming an attractive option for a member of the opposite sex means pursuing the things in life that make you happy.  That means doing what excites you and fills you with passion - as long as it’s moral, of course.  Here are some tips to make your life more interesting.

• Your work should reflect your passions.  If you are in IT simply because you’ve always been a guy with “computer skills,” it can be hard to admit, but you might not be following your passions.  What line of work excites you and fills you with the fire that makes work more enjoyable?
• Find hobbies you enjoy that are active and/or social.  If a woman asks you what you enjoy doing, and your response is to say “Well, I like watching TV” with the dead zombie eyes of someone who wishes they had a better answer, this means your hobbies aren’t active enough.  Ask yourself what kind of activities you enjoy that can get you out of the house and talking to people.

In life, as human beings, everyone has value - and equal value.  When it comes to dating, everyone has something that makes them unique and interesting, but not everyone is able to express that.  Ask yourself “would I date me if I was a member of the opposite sex?” and you’re on your way to building that kind of expression.