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glennmore on Getting woman attention

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 13:38:40 -0500

I'm interested in a girl at work that is not really interested in me. Well she doesn't seem to be interested I tried talking to her and asking questions but all she gives me is short sharp answers and doesn't seem that interested. Does any one have any tips or know of any guides on getting him to notice me?I'd really like a guide or something like that where i can try out a few things and have a bit of fun while testing the ideas.

Admin on Have Some Dating Doubts? Then Start Small

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 19:07:25 -0500

It’s not hard to peruse the internet these days and come across a myriad of dating advice. A simple click of the Google search button or the clicking of an advertisement can send you into a whirlwind of dating advice and knowledge. Sometimes, all of this knowledge can be a bit too much.

Have you ever tried to improve your dating life, but found that when you went out your door and into the real world, it’s actually incredibly nerve-racking and even downright intimidating? Don’t worry; it’s time to take the pressure off. It’s time to start small.

How to Work Your Way into a Good Outing

It’s more important to be out there taking action than it is to stay cooped up inside and reading dating tips (except this article, of course!). If you’ve read a lot of dating advice, going out and trying to meet new people comes with a lot of pressure. What if they reject you? What if you come across as weird or creepy? What if you get embarrassed?

To beat these jitters, start by forgetting your long-term goals and simply focus on tonight. Tonight, you’re going to start small.

If you’ve never been a very active dater before, chances are that you’re going to feel shy. You can’t exactly go from zero to hero overnight. That’s why for this next outing, you’ll need to start small.

Just focus on approaching one to three new groups of strangers. Don’t worry about how they react to you; just saying “Hello” is enough to consider this outing a success. You might be surprised at how approaching just a few people can turn your night upside-down, get you out of your shell, and actually get you to have a good time.

One quick note: to prevent lingering at the bar or standing in the corner, try to approach someone right away once you enter. Something as simple as “do you have the time?” is enough.

You wouldn’t expect to grow muscles overnight. So why should you expect to grow social muscles overnight? Just work on getting your reps in, and the muscles will come.

Set Short-Term Goals

Once you’ve mastered the art of getting out there and actually meeting new people, you should feel ready to start working on your social skills. Don’t assume you have to make out with every new girl you meet, or that you have to become some Playboy overnight. Instead, progressively work on your social skills by setting small, short-term goals.

For example, if eye contact has always been a problem for you, start focusing on keeping eye contact with people for a week or so, until you no longer feel uncomfortable doing it. From there, work your way up – if you’ve never felt comfortable giving people compliments, resolve yourself to giving a stranger a compliment every day.

You can even start smaller if you want. If you don’t want to meet new people right away, at least get yourself out of the house. The important thing is taking action that can build up real momentum in your life, and not lagging while trying to find the latest advice that can solve everything for you.

You will solve your problems. Not the advice. So take that first step, and keep walking.

Dan on Pamela Anderson vs Jenny McCarthy

Tue, 07 Jul 2009 03:21:10 -0500

Pamela Anderson and Jenny McCarthy have to be considered two of the premier blondes of their generation. Hey, that sounds a lot like sports language, which is fitting because Jenny's holding the football. Which is your favorite?

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Dan on Gerard Butler vs Dwayne Johnson

Mon, 25 May 2009 01:05:15 -0500

Ladies, you know that Gerard Butler made a name for himself after destroying countless movie-extra Persians in 300. So how does that stack against a guy with the nickname "The Rock"?

[poll id="143"]

Dan on Angela Kinsey vs Mindy Kaling

Fri, 22 May 2009 01:38:39 -0500

If you ever wondered what it would be like to have women from Hottie Matchup work in an office with you, these two The Office stars give you a clue by appearing in a show about an office. So now you can live vicariously through Michael Scott.

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Dan on How to "Practice" Dating

Fri, 22 May 2009 01:35:32 -0500

You've heard a lot of advice on this Web site that talks about getting practice under your belt. But how exactly does someone "practice" some like that? Aren't there too many variables? Shouldn't you view the woman as more than "practice"? And isn't it hard to practice dating when you can't get a date in the first place? All very good questions - and ones we'll want to wrestle with. That's why this article will have the answers. Aren't there too many variables? Sure, but like anything, you'll find that dating has several principles that you can practice over and over - the "fundamentals," if you will. There are plenty of variables in how a single game of basketball is played, yet preparing with fundamentals like shooting, defense, and dribbling will help you immeasurably. What are some of these "dating" fundamentals? I can think of a few off the top of my head: confidence, positivity, healthy self-esteem. Having these fundamentals well-prepared for will help you on each date - even if you see something new every time. Shouldn't you view women as more than "practice?" Of course. The more women you approach, the easier it is to fall into the trap of viewing each interaction as worth little. In my opinion, that trap is easier to avoid than the trap that comes when you place too much value on any given interaction with a woman. If you barely talk to women at all, and happen to meet one you like, your lack of dating life will manifest in your nervousness around her, your neediness, and your eagerness to please. These all kill attraction quickly. It's okay to talk to a lot of people in order to gain more social experience. If you fall into the trap of viewing women only as "practice," then you need to get re-focused on how you can go out and make someone's day - not take something from them. Isn't it hard to practice dating when you can't get a date in the first place? Well, everyone has to start somewhere. If you can't get a date, maybe you just need to practice talking more, or making more eye contact in social situations. Build up from there. If you have trouble approaching women you haven't met, maybe you can start without putting pressure on yourself - start by asking them the time or for directions. Don't place too much pressure on yourself; you don't have to be an instant success. Just remember that results build over time - six months down the line, you might be shocked at how difficult it seemed to get a date at the time. And finally: how to practice dating Practicing your social skills is different for each person - it all depends on where you're starting from. But with dedication and self-awareness, you can push through the learning curve and make serious improvements to your life. Here are a few tips for doing just that:

Write down a goal. What do you want? A new date every week? A girlfriend who supports you? Write that goal down and paste it somewhere you can see it every day.
Decide what you need to work on. Write down a list of just a few things you need to work on - being more outgoing, making eye contact, wearing better clothes, etc. Don't make it a huge list; just small, realistic goals you can begin working on today.
Leave the apartment or house and practice. Do you need better eye contact? Try to make eye contact with people. Are you afraid of approaching strangers? Say "hi" to a few people and ask them how their day's going. Leave your comfort zone - you should feel challenged but not overwhelmed.
Write out your results and what you learned - followed by what you can learn tomorrow. This can take place in the form of a "diary" where you write a few paragraphs about what happened. You'd be amazed at how much this will help you see things that you didn't see while you were out. Don't skip this step.
Repeat four times per week. Go through this ritual four times a week - see what you wrote last time, work on your particular points, and then record your results and needed improvements in your diary. Stick with it.

Dan on Hayden Christensen vs James Franco

Thu, 07 May 2009 14:16:19 -0500

These two celebrities are famous for the famous franchises of which they've taken apart - Christensen played Anakin Skywalker in the Star Wars prequels and James Franco played Harry Osbourne in the Spider-Man movies.

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Dan on Five Tips for An Improved Vibe

Thu, 07 May 2009 14:15:16 -0500

You've heard of it before: the always-important "vibe." The kind of energy you're sending out. The unconscious message your body language tells. It's such a hard thing to define and understand, but it means so much for how we come across to the opposite sex. So how exactly can you understand your vibe and then go about changing it for the better? Here are some tips for doing just that. 1. Find out where you stand. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, so you're going to want to know where you are (point A) if you're ever going to get to where you want to go (point B). It's time to assess yourself honestly and be willing to hear some unpleasant things. Try going on Facebook and digging up a few acquaintances - people who know you on a more superficial level - and tell them the following: you're looking to try to improve the vibe you give off and you were wondering if they could give you an honest assessment about your vibe. Why just acquaintances? Wouldn't friends be more trustworthy? Well, your friends know your character much better - but the vibe you give off is usually fairly discernible after a day or two of knowing you. 2. Figure out what's causing the vibe you don't want. If you got some unflattering answers, then it's time to go about changing the vibe. I remember being told that I put off a vibe that made it uncomfortable for people to be anything other than polite. Sounds good, right? Not always - sometimes you want people to simply be themselves. So ask yourself what your objectives are and what kind of vibe you do want. Sometimes, just thinking about that kind of vibe can be a step in the right direction. But also ask yourself why you were putting off the original (undesirable) vibe in the first place. Is it the way you carry yourself? Is it the way you behaved with that person? Don't take the opinions of your acquaintances as hard fact. But do take it into consideration as feedback. 3. Explore the "forbidden zone," not the comfort zone. Now that you know where you want to go, you're going to have to change your attitude a bit in order to change your basic vibe. This might mean going some places you've never gone before, to steal a phrase from "Star Trek." Do you think you give off a "needy" vibe? It's time to do some uncomfortable things that go in the opposite direction. Stop calling that one girl. Busy yourself with something else. It might feel a bit strange or difficult at first, but that's ok - it's always a little challenging to take on a change. Find out where your comfort zone has been, and then break out of it. Your comfort zone has a huge impact on your vibe. 4. Set new standards for yourself. If you want other people to view you a certain way, you've got to view yourself that way first. That means setting new standards for yourself. If you want to have the vibe of a confident man, you're actually going to have to - gasp! - act more confidently. This means, as mentioned in tip #3, that you'll want to be doing some things you didn't do before. This means approaching that girl you would have talked yourself out of approaching. If you want to adopt a more relaxed vibe, you'll have to start relaxing more. Easy to say, difficult to do. 5. Dress the part. Finally, to fill in the holes on your new vibe, simply decide you've taken on a new identity and start dressing for the part - even before you feel comfortable doing it. If this means changing the kinds of clothes you wear, getting a new haircut, or even changing your living space, do it. It will all help you to shape your own identity for yourself. Does this mean you're pretending to be something you're not? Of course it does. But just at first. Over time, you'll find yourself adapting to a new identity. You'll feel more confident because of all the evidence around you that says you live the life of a confident man. Force your own brain to adapt to the changes; don't wait for the changes to occur. Be realistic, however, and make sure that the vibe you're chasing is really worthwhile and positive. It's difficult to say "I'm going to be less shy." It's better to say "I'm confident now." And make sure your vibe is sustainable, friendly, and still provides value to people when you hang out with them.

Dan on Evangeline Lilly vs Emily Browning

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 00:46:13 -0500

Evangeline Lilly stars on the TV hit Lost and hails from Canada - Emily Browning starred in Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events and hails from Australia.

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Dan on Morgan Webb vs Kristin Adams

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 13:51:32 -0500

Unless you're a fan of the G4 network, you're probably not sure who these two ladies are. But apparently G4 is something like the Hottie Matchup channel. Morgan Webb hosts X-Play and Adams hosts Cheat! I'm sure that means something to the nerds out there.

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Dan on Rashida Jones vs Brittany Snow

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 13:51:15 -0500

Rashida Jones recently starred in I Love You, Man and is busy becoming a household name, while Brittany Snow's efforts in movies like The Pacifier have, uh, not quite gotten her there yet.

[poll id="125"]

Dan on Which Online Dating Site is For You?

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 13:50:56 -0500

There's a plethora of online dating sites out there - all you have to do is surf MySpace or some similar site for a few seconds to realize that lots of companies are trying to get you to open your credit cards. But what's the right one? Is there a "best" one? Let's take a deeper look into some online dating sites and see what they're all about. Match.com Match.com is perhaps the strongest dating site out there. There's a subscription to pay, but Match.com has plenty of members, well-developed profiles and lots of people with pictures. If you plan on paying for your online dating site, there's a good chance you'll want to go with Match.com. Match.com is also all about search features, and makes it relatively simple to scan their database for people near you who meet your criteria. This helps you to find people you might not have otherwise found if you had simply hit the traditional dating scene. PlentyOfFish.com The infamous free online dating site, Plentyoffish's tagline tells you to put the credit card away. And with plenty of people registered at Plentyoffish, this is probably your best option for a free online dating site. Its disadvantages? It's a little too easy to set up a profile, which means not everyone might be as seriously looking for love as you are. Plentyoffish is, however, great for developing your online dating skills, tweaking your profile, and testing to see which pictures get you the best response. You can bring that knowledge with you to a pay site like Match.com later. eHarmony.com Not having a lot of experience with eHarmony myself, I can tell you that its high amount of scrutiny can get annoying - eHarmony prides itself on being all about compatibility but this can make things a little cumbersome. But hey, if you're looking for someone to do more of the work for you, maybe that's your thing. eHarmony is another pay site, so make sure you know that this is what you want before you go on eHarmony and set up your profile. The key here is, don't be afraid to test out these sites and drop the ones that don't really work for you. The more success you find with one site, the more you can focus on that site. The investment isn't all that much - several to a dozen dollars a month can easily overhaul your dating life if you're looking to really put effort into generating a solid online profile and attract members of the opposite sex. Now you know some sites that you can use - are you going to find that special someone or keep on waiting for luck to strike you?

Dan on Do Women Want You to Be the "Bad Boy"?

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 12:57:54 -0500

It's a common frustration for the smart, kindly men of the world: try though as they might, they don't seem to elicit the same response from women as a lot of the guys who actually seem dumber or even act like jerks. The "hot girl complaining about her jerk boyfriend to her nonthreatening male friend" stereotype really does seem to happen a lot. So is that the answer to getting women? Becoming a jerk, a bad boy, a rebel? Not necessarily. Let's take a look at exactly what's driving female attraction. Women Respond Powerfully to Behavioral Cues Deep down, a lot of us know that it's our behavior that has the most powerful impact in attracting women, not necessarily how we look. Many times, men make the mistake of assuming that attraction works for women the same way it works for men. It doesn't. But what exactly are women to attracted to? It's one thing to say "behavioral cues," but what types of behaviors really attract them? They're behaviors that reveal your high status. Status is about perception, so essentially your behaviors should reveal that you really believe you're a high status guy. For many guys, they don't actually believe this, so it's hard to try to "act like it's true." But with some practice and some work on your beliefs, you can start to take on the qualities of a high status guy. You'd be surprised how many behaviors reveal your low status. Behaviors like a stilted/quiet voice, fidgeting, or remaining quiet tell the world how you expect to be treated. An Example of Behavioral Cues that Women are Attracted To If you'd like to see what it looks like, watch the video in the article How to Have Fun and Excite Women at the Same Time. No joke. That video of English rock star Robbie Williams feeling no social filter and amusing himself doesn't only crack up all of the women around him, it elicits plenty of responses from female commenters on its YouTube page. In the video, Robbie Williams is being interviewed by a female reporter but decides to give her a hard time, eventually staring her down and leaning in to kiss her. It could have come across as creepy or weird, but Robbie doesn't seem concerned with that, so it actually comes across as playful and funny. Look at these comments it's getting from women:

Lol if he would do that to me.... jeez I would be stress out as well but at least i would kiss him - f*** the television, camera man and other people heheh Robbie is damn sexxy why doesnt she kiss him? she was dazzled.. lucky b****!))who the hell can resist this?is she a lesbian?screw the fact that you r on television,it's Roooobbie...maaan.best guy on earth

Some would say that Robbie Williams acted like a "jerk" in that video. He clearly made the reporter uncomfortable, as transfixed as she might have been. Is this really how to behave around women? In actuality, whether or not you are a "jerk" is irrelevant. It's more of a matter of amusing yourself and not letting her potential opinion of you govern your behavior. You say what you want because you want to say it. You do what you want because you want to do it. If a woman can see that you don't have a huge "filter" up, she knows that you're not too concerned with how other people perceive you. When she sees this in your behavior, she knows that you view yourself as high status in that situation, and she becomes attracted. Whether or not you were a jerk is immaterial. Women don't necessarily want a bad boy. But they do want a man who's confident enough to put his personality out there.

Dan on Casey Carlson vs Katrina Darrell

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 12:57:18 -0500

These two 2009 American Idol contestants tried to shake things up with their looks, but were ultimately found wanting through the process. That doesn't mean they can't find a second life through Hottie Matchup, though.

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Dan on Josh Hartnett vs Ewan McGregor

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 12:57:04 -0500

This Hottie Matchup for the Ladies pits two co-stars of Black Hawk Down against each other. You might also recognize McGregor from the Star Wars prequel trilogy, and Hartnett from movies like Sin City.

[poll id="123"]